So my lady friend, being the wonderful woman she is, was looking into buying me a cock ring. And being the willing participant in her devious plans, I proceeded to break out the scissors and paper and measure myself.

12 inches?!

"Hey now, self," I said to... myself, "I know you're a big mean boy and all, but that just doesn't sit right!" So, I remeasured with the same strip of paper. 12 inches again. Hm.

I thought I was doing this right! I took the paper, placed it at the top-middle of my cock, slung it down and under, behind my balls. Then I brought it up and back over the top of my cock, fitting it snug against my skin. I made sure not to pull it too tight or what-have-you, but I also made sure it wasn't loose.

So I pondered this a little bit, much akin to how one ponders the other unfathomable mysteries of the universe, and after a short time, presented my newest life-changing problem to my lovely mare. Sadly, she was baffled as well.

I figured I might as well experiment a little with the paper to see if I could modify the results in such a way that would bring down the size to, dare I say, realistic levels, and still keep true to the instructions.

After noting that perhaps the paper strip itself was too thick, I cut it in twine. Snicker-snack and all that. Remeasurement?

11 inches or so! Roughly the same.

Now, for those of us at home not keeping score, 12 and 11 inch measurements divided by three roughly equal 4. And the rings I'm looking at aren't approaching 4 inch diameters sometime in the next millenia.

So I sat and pondered some more, tossing around the idea of posting to these very forums hoping a more experienced one might chime in on what I'm doing wrong - if anything. (*cough*freddy*cough)

It was around this time my beautiful babe softly suggested one more idea. One of those cloth measuring tapes! I mean, sure. Why the hell not!

Well, that test came out to roughly 9 inches. Of course, I'm not sure how accurate that could be seeing as those measuring tapes run about 1 inch thick, and the instructions clearly read not to go any wider than 1/4 of that.

So, anyone have some suggestions?

HERE is a topic that has links to other threads with similar issues.

The search function is probably your best bet here.

~Ang