< !--color--> I've been with my man for almost a year ,and he's a great guy and tireless when it comes to sex; he lasts for an hour or more every time. But he's only ever eaten me twice and never for more than a minute. I tell him how good it feels, and his excuse is that he thinks he's bad at doing it. I've bought books and read them all myself, but I don't know how to tell him practice makes perfect and give him those damn books. I'm one of those many women who can't climax from sex alone, and I think I would if he'd just spend more time arousing me. Since I have no problem giving him oral, I think I deserve a bit more foreplay than what I'm getting. I could use all the suggestions I can get. Please help! Thank you!

I have to kind of agree with ca_grown on this one. Let him know how much it pleases you and that practice makes perfect. One of the best things you can do (and one of the biggest turn-ons for us men) is to talk him through the whole thing as he goes down on him. Let him know when he's hitting the right spots, how fast and hard he should lick at any given moment, and especially when you are coming. Chances are he'll definitely catch on and keep doing it!

My cowboy has a "habit" of playing first and licking his fingers before he ever goes down on me. He once told me he had a bad experience with a girl that wasn't too umm.."tasty" so it's almost a taste test I guess. It makes it hotter for me because when I kiss him I can taste me on him!

Someone else here asked this question, and not too long ago. If you look back a page or two...it was called "How to get my man to go Down There" or something like that. We all had suggestions for her, and it worked out great for her, so maybe you'll be lucky.

I think the "I'm not good at it" thing is a lame excuse. I think he's grossed out by it. I have had a couple men in my past who were grossed out.

Since he might be easily turned off, avoid any potential turn-offs: Be sure you look and that you don't have any smegma (white stuff) hiding near the top of the slit, near the clit and where the pee comes out. Be sure your hiney is clean enough to lick, too. Be sure it's not anywhere near That Time of the month. Give the pubes a trim at the slit, if you aren't shaved.

I know you can withold his oral if he won't go down on you, but if you're like me, that's not a good solution. I don't want someone to go down on me if he's grossed out by it. I want him to enjoy it, or at least be "okay" with it for a short period of time.

I have to say, as a bisexual woman, that some women are really nice to eat. And there are others, I have gagged, what can I tell ya? They tasted salty or smelled too strong even right after washing (they were all shaved and clean, too.) --->You might have to douche if he admits you have a strong taste. I hate to see someone douche, but...if you do, use 2C. fresh water and 1/4 C. white vinegar. If you use plain water you are more likely to get vaginitis. Don't douche too much; it's really not good for ya. But it might help him enjoy things better.

Good luck!

Yeah, I got a buddy that calls it the belly button test. He says he starts kissing his way down and if he can smell anything when he gets to the belly button... he heads back north. But nobody ever accused Junior of being a classy guy.

~Ranger

Okay the stickybeak is here...does he know you can't come from intercourse alone? If he does know what's he doing to help you be satisfied? It might be time for the frank talk about the way you feel. "I feel a bit hurt or whatever-----when you don't ---------I'd really love it if you would-------it makes me feel so great." You have a right to ask for what you want and need. I guess he also has a right to say no.

Off the top of my head, you could try also sixty nine position but laying down head to tail it's less tiring -- he gets his as you get yours or you take little turns.

Another possibility is to try and take the focus of fucking as the main event and everything else is foreplay leading up to that event. We've added a lot more fun to our sex life doing just that, a session may end in many ways but invariably we're both very satisfied.

Good luck. BTW This is just a personal bugbear so choose to ignore if you wish. I don't equate clean with shaved or trimmed even, that might be your preference but I don't think it's compulsory, clean is soap and water mostly.If you are healthy a pussy smells like pussy not a field of lavender and the old "I'll get a hair getting caught in my throat" thing is a crock as far as I'm concerned. Pubic hair is not to be feared!

Geezus where are my manners, Welcome!

Well, I think Country lovin has received a lot of great advice from the crew of lovers her at F & E. You guys are the BEST, you know that?! Look CL, you now have a lot of tricks in your bag to use on your man. If none of them work, you need to sit down and have a one on one chat. But try all of the remedies offered. They've proven to be great choices. If all your man needs is a little treat, try some clit cream which have some great tastes, while giving your clit a "warming" sensation, or try to bring a little art work, like using some of the chocolate paints to have him visit your clit and lips. Paint a line from your belly button down to the top of pussy(if not shaven),then a little along your inner thighs, and see if he doesn't go for your clit. I know a lot of members here,would! Good Luck!

You all have given me some great things to try... especially flavoring to be added... The reason I'm hesitant to talk to him about me not being satisfied is because I have a whole lot more sex experience than he does. He's 27 and only had sex with 1 other girl besides me. I'm 23 and been with at least 15 guys (all safely I assure you). I've only said a little about what I've experimented with, and he's very adamant about not even trying some things I've done (even though those things have brought me to climax). Unfortunately, I haven't gotten the balls to tell him face to face, for fear of sending him running to somebody a little less adventurous than me.(I know i shouldn't fear it, but the thought is still there) But to answer the smell question, I don't think he doesn't like the taste or smell of me. We've gone at it for awhile, then i've gone down on him, then he'll spend a LONG time kissing me with my pussy smell on my face. I need to broach the subject with him soon, or I may just have to move on. (Hoping not) Thank you all again for your help on this difficult situation.

My wife doesn't usually cum with vaginal intercourse alone. Oral does it for her completely. I love doing it but a few things have contributed to my love for it. For example, eager to please, I'm happy to accept instruction. I once had a g/f that stopped me from my lizard tongue flicking of the clit and showed me what she really wanted. I was so grateful and now my wife reaps the rewards. Additionally, I had one g/f who would slip a cherry flavored lifesavor in just the right spot before initiating sex. It was a wonderful surprise and was good to the last lick. I think the best thing to take away from this is that we guys are continually amazed that you know what makes you feel good and I think a large majority of us would be happy if you shared those secrets with us. Let him know what pleases you.

Hmm. How many licks *does* it take to get to the centre of a tootsie pop?

You may need some additional stimulator that tastes good. Suggest you try a clitorial stimulating gel. It will rush the blood to the clitorial region quickly. You can apply it earlier in the day -- (you will either get a warming sensation or a cooling sensation). Then ask for some oral sex, first you will taste like peppermint so he should enjoy that then your experience from earlier in the day with the gel will only be enhanced. You may experience an orgasm quickly because the area has heightened sensitivity. There are a couple of brands on the market, feel free to email message me and I will give you their names.

I just want to say how much it means to me that some people care enough to give out advice to a girl who wouldn't find the guts to talk to her man without some prodding. I finally sat down with him and showed him my first post, and he was shocked. He wishes I had just come to him first! Talk about relief on my part, he said he didn't even know how much I enjoy everything he does. From now on, I vow to tell him what makes me scream! Also, scifi, could you let me know the names of those clit stimulating gels. I could use all the help I can get! Thank you!!!

Countrylovin23, that's a great story and response, thanks for filling us in on how things are going, strangers can be good at "prodding" as you put it. I think I've found that mostly in life you're got a much greater chance of getting what you want and need, if you ask for it. Have fun.