I was wondering if someone could help me.I am having trobule achieveing a orgasm while my husband is down below.I can have great and very intense orgasms while he is inside of me .But while he is down below he said he would like for me to let go .But for some reason I just can not let go.Can someone help me.Some please help me with this... < !--color-->

Welcome Kathericlm.
Well, I don't know if I can answer your question, since the answer is not black and white, but a large gray area. Since you can only have an orgasm with your husband in you, it's obvious that you need penetration to have the "O". One way to experiment(the fun part!) is as he is doing oral on you, add a toy that would be mimic your hubby penetrating you, such as dildo, vibrator or glass toy. That way, you are being stimulated on the clit by his tongue and simultaneously having penetration. A great combo! Try it out and tell us what you ended up liking.

We tried something like that last night and .I get to the point where I am to the point to explode and I just can not let go.Is there any exercises I can do to relax or anything I can do to relax my body like I am suppose to.My hubby said it is because I am not relaxing and clearing my mind.Is there something I can do.

RE: Uncumelingus

The first time I ever went down on a woman (if my 17 year old high school sweetheart counts as a woman) she came. In fact she didn't just come, she grabbed my head and ground my face into her throbbing twat while her body convulsed and she started to sob. I was hooked, and since that time, pussy eating has been my number one go-to move in both one night stands and longterm relationships. Not every women I ever slept with came from having me pound away on her, but they got off when I went down. Until I met my wife.

Making my wife orgasm from oral sex is mystical combination of skill, luck, and alignment of the planets. Vibrator? Bam! A good plowing? Yes, Yes, Yes!� But let me lay her back and go to lunch at the big Y and the results more often than not are a "that's really nice, but why don't you come up here and let me take care of you."

No, it's not me, she was like that before she met me (or so she says.) But it hurts my pride none the less. I used to be The Man when it came to sucking snatch. I used to hear things like "If I didn't know better, I'd think you had a pussy of your own." Now I'm just like every other ignorant boob they make fun of on shows like Roseanne. You'd think that the fact that she gets off from fucking more easily and more often than any other woman I've ever been with would be more than enough compensation, but it's not. Somehow deep inside I know the credit for that nifty trick belongs to her.

PS - There's a twist. Until I met my wife I never really understood all the fuss about blowjobs. I don't mean to say I didn't mind getting my dick sucked, but I never had to say "I promise not to cum in your mouth," because I (almost) never did.

Since meeting my wife, I've found what all the fuss is about. In fact, recent refinements in her technique have gotten things to the point that I probably wouldn't bother to fuck her, except that's the only way I can get her off...

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The point is, there's no "right way" to get off. Many (most?) couple would be thrilled to have your "problem"; the women never get off from penetration and they and their husbands are searching for a way to make that work � because they think penetration is the right way to get off.

Relax, stop stressing, enjoy a good plowing.

-T.C.

It's in your head! Having a good orgasm isn't necesssarily all about stimulation of the glands. It is also in your mind. I would suggest a few things. First, try fantasising out loud with your husband. Create an erotic story and have him help finish the story as you are being stimulated. For example, are you being exhibitionists somewhere? Keep that in your head. Focus on the imagery of your fantasy as you are being stimulated. Practice this regularly. This should help and it will also keep your mind off of the other things going on while in an intimate encounter with your husband.

Another idea that may assist you is to use a clitorial stimulating gel. This rushes the blood to the clitorial area rather quickly and increases sensitivity. It is a short-term topical aid, but you may find that it works very well.

Mr Comstock has the word down. Most women do not come from penetration and do come from a good licking. I personally do not care either way, because I aim to please HOWEVER I can. As long as she is satisfied then I am satisfied. I still like to plow her and so does she. Just keep it fun and adhere to no stress, and in time your mind will allow for the release. Maybe you are stressing about it too much and that is holding you back. When my mind is overly active and I can't sleep, I think of black, as deep a black as I can, then I fall asleep. What if when you are getting licked, you think of nothing else than the warmth of your clit, the stimulation of feeling. Get the room warm, quiet, lit well, maybe music. Set the mood so there are no distractions and everything is close to perfect. Then just relax and do not worry about anything and RELAX. Just relax and let go. If you do not come, who cares, you are still having fun and being licked and loved. ENJOY it. If you come great, if not great. Then try again in a few hours or next day. You will, just enjoy, relax and do not stress, you are having sex.

i agree with scifi..it can be all mental if you let it. sometimes i can come without ever being touch down there..tension, thoughts breathing..sometimes better with nipple stimulation...i have some of the best orgasms and more intense when i go that way.

If you need him in you to cum, then you just have to sit back relax and while he's being all gentle and nice think real hard about him "plowing" (to quote the guys above)you. Now when I say real hard, I mean enjoy the idea, and build yourself up a nice big fantasy! And remember relax and go with the flow, but continue to get that fantasy fire burning. Sometimes you have to trick your head into thinking it's the right time, so as to make it the right time!

anyways, just a thought!

O.

I've never been a fan of oral, it just doesn't do it for me. I've almost come from having my partner just focus on my breasts and nothing else, but very rarely do I come from licking. For me it's a mental thing. I feel it's too personal, and it's hard for me to relax. I'm self concious, awkward. I'd rather pull his mouth up to my breasts and have him "plow" me as the gents so romantically put it. It is hard when that is what your partner prefers to do, but patience, compromise and open communication can help a lot! Good luck!

MBA - your my kind of gal!

I've never had an orgasm from oral, ever. I enjoy oral, but it's not going to get me there...the times I've been close, there was a lot of deep breaths and focusing on the sensations. I agree that there is no "recipe" for orgasm that will work for everyone. Each of us is different and taking the time to find what works and doesn't work for us is part of the fun.

You might find that wanting to orgasm because of the oral is preventing you from doing so (at least partially, adding to the issue at least) as you have obviously realised it doesn't happen and have tried other methods its obviously getting in your head that you need to come during it. Just aiming to enjoy the stimulation and get rid of the pressure of an orgasm being the big finish might help you relax. sometimes realising that it doesn't work for you and your partner wanting it to work for you just makes it not work even more!

I agree that sometimes the "O", or lack there of is in your head. When i have a hard time getting there with oral, I switch positions. Sometimes if i am riding his face, and I am in control of my orgasm, it works better that way. Try changing the position....it might be fun ...for both of you.....