I wasn't sure just where to post this, but since it seems to be about me ...

About my condition...

They have finally found a diagnosis for my condition. I have Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder...

This is how it goes: I decide to wash the car; I start toward the garage and notice the mail on the table. OK, I'm going to wash the car.

But first I'm going to go through the mail. I lay the car keys down on the desk, discard the junk mail and I notice the trashcan is full. OK, I'll just put the bills on my desk and take the trashcan out,

But since I'm going to be near the mailbox anyway, I'll pay these few bills first. Now, where is my checkbook?

Oops, there's only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk. Oh, there's the coke I was drinking. I'm going to look for those checks.

But first I need to put my coke further away from the computer, oh maybe I'll pop it into the fridge to keep it cold for a while. I head towards the kitchen and my flowers catch my eye, they need some water. I set the coke on the counter and find my glasses. I was looking for them all morning! I'd better put them away first.

I fill a container with water and head for the flower pots. Someone left the TV remote in the kitchen. We'll never think to look in the kitchen tonight when we want to watch television

So I'd better put it back in the family room where it belongs. I splash some water into the pots and onto the floor, I throw the remote onto a soft cushion on the sofa and I head back down the hall trying to figure out what it was I was going to do?

End of Day: The car isn't washed ; the bills are unpaid ; the coke is sitting on the kitchen counter ; the flowers are half watered ; the checkbook still only has one check in it and I can't seem to find my car keys!

When I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY LONG! I realize this is a serious condition and I'll get help,

BUT FIRST I think l'll check my e-mail.

Sector, you have my complete solidarity... especially because I feel I have always been living like that. I guess my condition was induced into me all the way back in my mother´s womb. Incidentally all the women in my family are like that in my mother´s side, so I guess genetics may play a role too. I get reroached at work all the time for leaving things around. It does create problems. Keys and wallets costantly mislaid papers forgotten right and left.
Creative projects are the only things that can keep me focused. So focused actually that I forget EVERYTHING else at times.
Someone told me that it is a symptom of a a hyperactive mind, I hope it is a positive thing!



Take care, keep us posted, don´t let anybody give you unnecessary medications of any sort, hugs, Katy

snow, my sweet sexy wife is exactly like you. she's one of those super intelligent people that go through high school in 2 years, gets nothing but a 4.0 in college.

she can be in the kitchen cooking or baking and every cabinet door is open, she always leaves the drawers out at least partially. the lights are all on in the house. yesterday she left the freezer door open and left for work (i found it at noon). she buys reading glasses 3 pairs at a time because she never remembers where she left them. misplaces library books for months at a time. leaves the water running and walks away, leaves the oven on.....etc., etc.

on the flip side of that....she's a corporate tax accountant for a large company here in the southwest. she runs a tax service no charge to underprivileged and low income families. she volunteers in the community, and most of all she's absolutely awesome in bed.

i think a lot of people who are borderline genius are alike in that regard. that's just the way she's built.....and i like it!

me..... i'm the mundane, logical caretaker.

LOL...the bane of the multi-tasker!

My solution is to make lists....and then lose them. Yesterday, I managed to find one of those lists which had a lot of those long-neglected tasks on it.

"Install wireless printer software" was number one on the list. Back when I bought the new printer a couple months ago, I was doubly careful to put the disk away in a drawer in my printer cabinet. I even have the mental image of doing it, and saying to one of my kids who was witness, "Now this one isn't going to got lost. See, I'm putting it in its proper place."

So yesterday, I opened the drawer with a smug look on my face, only to find it was GONE! And, not in any of the other drawers either. Oh, there was the Macintosh version, but not the one I needed.

So, I added something to my list...."Call Hewlett Packer tech support for download directions."

Another zigzag day in my life.

don't know if you girls do this or not...

i always know what she's doing without even seeing her...because she says aloud everything she does.

i have to iron my skirt...i need to brush my teeth...fix my lunch....feed the dogs and birds...go pee...take meds..etc, etc.

Well, Ajay...I gotta say, I've been known to do that step-by-step vocalization of what I'm doing, but not absent-mindedly.

It's usually reserved for moments when I'm working my butt off, while the rest of the family acts like fat, happy landbarons, seated on the couch and asking for more Doritos, as I flit by on various missions. This typically precedes arrival of impromptu guests.

So, in my case, describing what I'm doing as I'm doing it is woman-speak for 'Get off your @sses and help me, damn it!"

Bear in mind, some intensely auditory people are wired in such a way to do this in a non-manipulative way. More like an absent-minded habit. But, for me, it's pure EVIL!

quote:

Originally posted by Cecily:

So, in my case, describing what I'm doing as I'm doing it is woman-speak for 'Get off your @sses and help me, damn it!"

For the language impaired, another auditory version is the slamming of cabinets, doors, pots & pans, etc.

quote:

My solution is to make lists....and then lose them.

I think one of the best list-episodes I know dates back to when I was still living with my parents. My granny had written a shopping list for my mother. My mother turned it around scribbled "I AM GOING TO THE SUPERMARKET" on it and left it on the kitchen table.
Needless to say she did not shop half of what was needed.
Yep, that´s my genes.

quote:

Originally posted by short & sexy mama:

quote:

Originally posted by Cecily:

So, in my case, describing what I'm doing as I'm doing it is woman-speak for 'Get off your @sses and help me, damn it!"

For the language impaired, another auditory version is the slamming of cabinets, doors, pots & pans, etc.

Which to me says,

STAY AWAY!!!! STAY FAR, FAR AWAY FROM ME!!!!


Unfortunately, what works better is, "Can you help me, please?"

quote:

Originally posted by Vorbis:
Unfortunately, what works better is, "Can you help me, please?"

Yes! Yes it does!! You're learning!!

~Kathy~

What's It Like To Have ADD?

by Edward M. Hallowell, MD
© 1992

What is it like to have ADD? What is the feel of the syndrome? I have a short talk that I often give to groups as an introduction to the subjective experience of ADD and what it is like to live with it:

Attention Deficit Disorder. First of all, I resent the term. As far as I'm concerned most people have Attention Surplus Disorder. I mean, life being what it is, who can pay attention to anything for very long? Is it really a sign of mental health to be able to balance your checkbook, sit still in your chair, and never speak out of turn? As far as I can see, many people who don't have ADD are charter members of the Congenitally Boring.

But anyway, be that as it may, there is this syndrome called ADD or ADHD, depending on what book you read. So what's it like to have ADD? Some people say the so-called syndrome doesn't even exist, but believe me, it does. Many metaphors come to mind to describe it. It's like driving in the rain with bad windshield wipers. Everything is smudged and blurred and you're speeding along, and it's reeeeally frustrating not being able to see very well. Or, it's like listening to a radio station with a lot of static and you have to strain to hear what's going on. Or, it's like trying to build a house of cards in a dust storm. You have to build a structure to protect yourself from the wind before you can even start on the cards.

In other ways it's like being super-charged all the time. You get one idea and you have to act on it, and then, what do you know, but you've got another idea before you've finished up with the first one, and so you go for that one, but of course a third idea intercepts the second, and you just have to follow that one, and pretty soon people are calling you disorganized and impulsive and all sorts of impolite words that miss the point completely. Because you're trying really hard. It's just that you have all these invisible vectors pulling you this way and that which makes it really hard to stay on task.

Plus which, you're spilling over all the time. You're drumming your fingers, tapping your feet, humming a song, whistling, looking here, looking there, scratching, stretching, doodling, and people think you're not paying attention or that you're not interested, but all you're doing is spilling over so that you can pay attention. I can pay a lot better attention when I'm taking a walk or listening to music or even when I'm in a crowded, noisy room than when I'm still and surrounded by silence. God save me from the reading rooms. Have you ever been into the one in Widener Library? The only thing that saves it is that so many of the people who use it have ADD that there's a constant soothing bustle.

What is it like to have ADD?

Buzzing. Being here and there and everywhere. Someone once said, "Time is the thing that keeps everything from happening all at once." Time parcels moments out into separate bits so that we can do one thing at a time. In ADD, this does not happen. In ADD, time collapses. Time becomes a black hole. To the person with ADD it feels as if everything is happening all at once. This creates a sense of inner turmoil or even panic. The individual loses perspective and the ability to prioritize. He or she is always on the go, trying to keep the world from caving in on top.

Museums. (Have you noticed how I skip around? That's part of the deal. I change channels a lot. And radio stations. Drives my wife nuts. "Can't we listen to just one song all the way through?") Anyway, museums. The way I go through a museum is the way some people go through Filene's basement. Some of this, some of that, oh, this one looks nice, but what about that rack over there? Gotta hurry, gotta run. It's not that I don't like art. I love art. But my way of loving it makes most people think I'm a real Philistine. On the other hand, sometimes I can sit and look at one painting for a long while. I'll get into the world of the painting and buzz around in there until I forget about everything else. In these moments I, like most people with ADD, can hyperfocus, which gives the lie to the notion that we can never pay attention. Sometimes we have turbocharged focusing abilities. It just depends upon the situation.

Lines. I'm almost incapable of waiting in lines. I just can't wait, you see. That's the hell of it. Impulse leads to action. I'm very short on what you might call the intermediate reflective step between impulse and action. That's why I, like so many people with ADD, lack tact. Tact is entirely dependent on the ability to consider one's words before uttering them. We ADD-types don't do this so well. I remember in the 5th grade I noticed my math teacher's hair in a new style and blurted out, "Mr. Cook, is that a toupee you're wearing?" I got kicked out of class. I've since learned how to say these inappropriate things in such a way or at such a time that they can in fact be helpful. But it has taken time. That's the thing about ADD. It takes a lot of adapting to get on in life. But it certainly can be done, and be done very well.

As you might imagine, intimacy can be a problem if you've got to be constantly changing the subject, pacing, scratching and blurting out tactless remarks. My wife has learned not to take my tuning out personally, and she says that when I'm there, I'm really there. At first, when we met, she thought I was some kind of nut, as I would bolt out of restaurants at the end of meals or disappear to another planet during a conversation. Now she has grown accustomed to my sudden coming and goings.

Many of us with ADD crave high-stimulus situations. In my case, I love the racetrack. And I love the high-intensity crucible of doing psychotherapy. And I love having lots of people around. Obviously this tendency can get you into trouble, which is why ADD is high among criminals and self-destructive risk-takers. It is also high among so-called Type A personalities, as well as among manic-depressives, sociopaths and criminals, violent people, drug abusers, and alcoholics. But is is also high among creative and intuitive people in all fields, and among highly energetic, highly productive people.

Which is to say there is a positive side to all this. Usually the positive doesn't get mentioned when people speak about ADD because there is a natural tendency to focus on what goes wrong, or at least on what has to be somehow controlled. But often once the ADD has been diagnosed, and the child or the adult, with the help of teachers and parents or spouses, friends, and colleagues, has learned how to cope with it, an untapped realm of the brain swims into view. Suddenly the radio station is tuned in, the windshield is clear, the sand storm has died down. And the child or adult, who had been such a problem, such a nudge, such a general pain in the neck to himself and everybody else, that person starts doing things he'd never been able to do before. He surprises everyone around him, and he surprises himself. I use the male pronoun, but it could just as easily be she, as we are seeing more and more ADD among females as we are looking for it.

Often these people are highly imaginative and intuitive. They have a "feel" for things, a way of seeing right into the heart of matters while others have to reason their way along methodically. This is the person who can't explain how he thought of the solution, or where the idea for the story came from, or why suddenly he produced such a painting, or how he knew the shortcut to the answer, but all he can say is he just knew it, he could feel it. This is the man or woman who makes million-dollar deals in a catnap and pulls them off the next day. This is the child who, having been reprimanded for blurting something out, is then praised for having blurted out something brilliant. These are the people who learn and know and do and go by touch and feel.

These people can feel a lot. In places where most of us are blind, they can, if not see the light, at least feel the light, and they can produce answers apparently out of the dark. It is important for others to be sensitive to this "sixth sense" many ADD people have, and to nurture it. If the environment insists on rational, linear thinking and "good" behavior from these people all the time, then they may never develop their intuitive style to the point where they can use it profitably. It can be exasperating to listen to people talk. They can sound so vague or rambling. But if you take them seriously and grope along with them, often you will find they are on the brink of startling conclusions or surprising solutions.

What I am saying is that their cognitive style is qualitatively different from most people's, and what may seem impaired, with patience and encouragement may become gifted.

The thing to remember is that if the diagnosis can be made, then most of the bad stuff associated with ADD can be avoided or contained. The diagnosis can be liberating, particularly for people who have been stuck with labels like "lazy," "stubborn," "willful," "disruptive," "impossible," "tyrannical," "a spaceshot," "brain damaged," "stupid," or just plain "bad." Making the diagnosis of ADD can take the case from the court of moral judgment to the clinic of neuropsychiatric treatment.

What is the treatment all about? Anything that turns down the noise. Just making the diagnosis helps turn down the noise of guilt and self-recrimination. Building certain kinds of structure into one's life can help a lot. Working in small spurts rather than long hauls. Breaking tasks down into smaller tasks. Making lists. Getting help where you need it, whether it's having a secretary, or an accountant, or an automatic bank teller, or a good filing system, or a home computer - getting help where you need it. Maybe applying external limits on your impulses. Or getting enough exercise to work off some of the noise inside. Finding support. Getting someone in your corner to coach you, to keep you on track. Medication can help a great deal too, but it is far from the whole solution. The good news is that treatment can really help.

Let me leave you by telling you that we need your help and understanding. We may make mess-piles wherever we go, but with your help, those mess-piles can be turned into realms of reason and art. So, if you know someone like me who's acting up and daydreaming and forgetting this or that and just not getting with the program, consider ADD before he starts believing all the bad things people are saying about him and it's too late.

The main point of the talk is that there is a more complex subjective experience to ADD than a list of symptoms can possibly impart. ADD is a way of life, and until recently it has been hidden, even from the view of those who have it. The human experience of ADD is more than just a collection of symptoms. It is a way of living. Before the syndrome is diagnosed that way of living may be filled with pain and misunderstanding. After the diagnosis is made, one often finds new possibilities and the chance for real change.

The adult syndrome of ADD, so long unrecognized, is now at last bursting upon the scene. Thankfully, millions of adults who have had to think of themselves as defective or unable to get their acts together, will instead be able to make the most of their considerable abilities. It is a hopeful time indeed.

quote:

Originally posted by Snowflake:
I can pay a lot better attention when I'm taking a walk or listening to music or even when I'm in a crowded, noisy room than when I'm still and surrounded by silence.

Aha! Now I know why I need the T.V. on when I'm cooking an elaborate meal. Someone can walk by me and ask what was just said on T.V., and I reply, "I don't know." It's basically just background noise that helps me concentrate on cooking and remembering to add all the ingredients in the right order so everything gets done at the same time. Without the T.V. on, I feel like my head is spinning.

I know the feeling. Don't talk to me when I am cooking - I will forget the salt. But Let me walk around when I talk. Works better. Let me have music or a crowded market stall for painting. Absurd. But it it's real.