This past weekend I had the opportunity to attend the Everything to do with Sex Show: London, the little brother to the larger (and wildly successful) Everything to do with Sex Show: Toronto that takes place in a few weeks.

And, in all truth, it fucking sucked.

First off, a few points of note:

1) London is considered to be one of the most conservative cities in Ontario. Not conservative like "Abortion No, Cause God Said So!!", but rather in a "Anything not conforming to our standard belief systems about anything is bad" sort of way. Companies will use London as a Canadian Test Center for edgy products or marketing campaigns, because they know if it works here, it will work anywhere.

For a lot of us, that basically means anything to with Sexuality that doesn't have the word "missionary" in it is essentially frowned upon. Puppetry of the Penis was officially protested here, and the city council acts as an ethical watchdog that has the power to shut down shows, impose bylaw infringement fines (I think), etc. Hooters lasted less than a year here.

2) It cost me $15 to get in.

3) I've heard ridiculously good things about the Toronto show, about how its THE gathering of Sex products and companies in Canada.

4) This is, I believe, the first show for ETDWS outside of Toronto

5) Kathy came with me to this. Despite the fact we're broken up and platonic, Kathy and I share interests in sex and sexuality, and were both interested in going. We're still friends, so she came up to London for the day, and came with me.

Now, I get my ticket and in we go. The first thing that hits me is the size- Its ridiculously small- 30 booths, perhaps. The second thing is the smell; Cheap, brain addling incense wafts throughout the building, which holds conventions and shows weekly. The booths are divided by black curtains, and I'm given a "ETDWSS" bag, and a map, which, because of the size, is irrelevant.

It takes me 5 minutes to start wondering whether or not I've just been jacked of my money- Right about the time I pass booths for teeth whitening, Psychic reading, Greek Cuisine, tattooing, videophones (old, bulky models at least 5 years out of date) cheap nasty incense (the cause of my quickly blossoming headache, and the nasty odour throughout the show) and a local scented candle maker that frequents art shows, and whom is located in a quaint, decidedly non-sexual small-town and has nothing in mood candles or erotic-related items. There was also an assortment of places selling T-shirts, nascar hats, and various other places that sold a few sex toys as an afterthought- literally, they'd have 5 sex toys, and the rest was non-related crap.

Oh, and I won't even start on the guy with the booth that was listed as a "XXX store going out of business", which literally consisted of a dozen or so boxes- cardboard boxes- of odds and ends (some sexual, some not)with a variety of prices slashed across them. In all honesty, there's a flea market on the city's east end that has a better set-up.

For the few booths that were actually sex-related, I was through them in less than 20 minutes, although admittedly I did skip the large Love Shop booth, on the premise that 1) Their store in the city is barely above the sleazy XXX video stores that scratch out a profit- or not- in ever-decreasingly locations throughout the city. 2) The booth's entrance was dominated by a MASSIVE case of pot paraphanalia- bongs, clips, and more shit than I could count- and I make it a point not to even consider buying from a sex shop who's primary marketing space is devoted to selling bongs, and 3) They don't know shit about what they sell, and most of what they sell is low-end schlock.

The Fantasia booth was staffed with mildly knowledgeable women who knew quite a bit about their products, but nothing whatsoever about anything not in the booth's limited selection. Indeed, queries about Liberator, Lelo and Tuyo were met with blank stares, and inquiries about Vibratex's rabbit were directed to a $139.99 Rabbit Habit. The vast majority of the products were low-end, poorly made clones of high-end products, and the booth's main goal seemed to be more about selling adult board games and increasing Fantasia's at-home party membership than educating people about sex toys.

Other points of non-interest include "Soft Condoms", some sort of "Social Tonics"- Pure Pillz, I think- which, from the literature in front of me, appears to be nothing more than low-potency Ecstasy. Oh, and one pill offers "more visuals/mildly psychedelic performance". If you want to score some E, that's fine, but selling it at a "Sex Show"?? There was the ubiquitous XXX Video booth, which, I'm quite certain, featured the remains of the XXX video store that "Love Shop" bought out when they opened their London location.

Relevant points of interest included "The Suite", an on-site Windsor/Detroit Swingers club, and Stripper Pole booth, and several booths dedicated to BDSM equipment, including one amateur builder that provided some quality pieces at reasonable prices. The pieces were well-made, and it was obvious that the builder put care into the products. Oh, and Durex was there, but the sample pickings were ridiculously slim.

Hedonism(s) had a booth there, but only because a local travel agency offered packages, and a local body-paint artist was on-hand for body-painting, although the building's owners made his model's wear nipple pasties, despite the fact that women going topless is legal in Ontario.

The bad points of this show are many: The stage shows- the ones that weren't canceled- were lacking, the fashion show was a brutal display of low-fashion lingerie that you find in plastic bags in low-end shops, and the seminars, while mildly informative, lacked any sort of oomph, and were often shorter than advertised, for lack of questions in the Q&A period. Audience interest bordered on indifferent.

Despite realizing 20 minutes in that I'd been jacked of my entry fee, 2 things in particular made the whole thing mildly bearable, and ensured that I would willingly give Toronto a chance in a few weeks.

1) The Dungeon. Dark Angel and his crew from ehbc.ca are a great bunch, and put on a hell of a BDSM clinic show. Dark Angel himself is entertaining, funny, and knows his shit. Kathy even volunteered for one of his demonstrations, and ended up being flogged, whipped, and lightly strangled during the demonstration. I laughed my balls off all the way through it. Dark Angel moved through topics, providing people with a BDSM primer, debunking some of the myths about BDSM, and demonstrating skills as he did so. Mad props to the Dungeon, which was one of the few professional-type displays at the show. They'll be in Toronto, and assured me that the debacle in London was NOTHING compared its bigger Toronto brother.

2) Kelly Garland

- The former owner of London's Libido Women's Emporium (sort of like a smaller version of F&E's boutique), Kelly now runs her own sexuality education and consulting enterprise, which offers workshops, speaking engagements, etc through www.libido-talk.com. I've spoken with Kelly before, and spent roughly 25 minutes talking to her and her assistant about how shitty the show was, the issues it had with dealing with the city of London, and about sexuality in general. Always a pleasure.

That's it. 2 measly good things about an otherwise ridiculously horrible show. I'd have paid $10 just for the Dungeon experience, but having to wade through the rest of the shit to find it dragged the experience down.

What really bothers me is the idea of going into a conservative city like London, and having the opportunity to show a prudish, stuck-up city just how professional and educational the Canadian Sex Industry can be, all the while milking people for a profit.

The show could have been a massive success, and actually could have hit its intended media-stated market (married, mid thirties, upper middle class, with kids) if it had had the professionalism and planning behind it. Instead where you'd expect to find high-end sellers and distributors, health Canada (or at least the local health unit) with info on STDs and sexual health, more education-based people like Kelly Garland, and informative, professional displays regarding sexuality and the Canadian Sex Industry, all you get is a low-end dildo/flea market that most people walked away disappointed, and with no different views on sex and sexuality.

In an industry (and market) rife with misconceptions, false-beliefs, lack of education, con-men and frauds, you'd think going into a city that ALWAYS errs on the side of conservatism would be a great jumping off point to dispel those ideas about the industry. Instead, its probably worse, at least in this city, and could even prove to be a future stumbling block to trying to expand to another city- There's no way London would EVER recommend the show for another city, and unless you're Ottawa or the Greater Toronto Area, London carries a fair-bit of sway across the province.

I doubt the show will be back, and, if this is an indication of what to expect next year, good riddance.

This article from the London FreePress BEFORE the sex show.

http://london.everythingtodowithsex.com/attendees/media.asp
Go down to Press- 2nd article listed of 3 articles.

quote:

ROMANCE: It's geared to enhance the personal lives of couples and singles
Sex focus of London trade show
Norman De Bono
Sun Media
August 27, 2008
OCT. 3-5: A national sex show is coming to London.
The Everything To Do With Sex Show, which bills itself as "Canada's Best Adult Consumer and
Trade Show," will be held at the Western Fairgrounds in October -- the first time it's been staged
outside Toronto.
"We think people in London are under-serviced in the romance market and we want to show
people what is new out there," said Mikey Singer, manager of show organizer SX Marketing in
Toronto.
But those expecting a lineup of porn stars and sex acts will be disappointed, he says.
This is a show geared to enhancing the personal lives of couples and singles, featuring products,
seminars on better sex and the entertainment will be more Cirque du Soleil than Debbie Does
Dallas.
"We don't cater to the adult entertainment industry. Our key demographic are people who have
been married 20 years and have three kids," Singer said.
"It's not a porn convention. We try to promote better quality in the bedroom."
Kelly Garland, owner of Libido, the erotic store on Talbot Street, will have a display at the show
and is also a guest speaker. She believes the stereotype of London as a conservative town is
exaggerated, saying residents are ready for this kind of event.
"People in London are interested in advancing their sexuality and learning things. This will open
up some exploration for people It will push some boundaries. I think this is progressive for the
city's image," said Garland.
Mayor Ann Marie DeCicco-Best was unaware the fair had booked the show, but trusts
management took steps to ensure it is tasteful.
"It will not be everyone's event, but we do not tell the fair what they can do. We expect they have
done their homework and will make sure nothing inappropriate or illegal takes place," she said.
Certainly not illegal, but there will be eroticism on display, including body spray artists,
tattooing, piercings, a performance by London firefighters and a "dungeon" where those
interested in bondage, domination and sado-masochism can indulge their fetish. It will also
feature stars from the adult television show Web Dreams.
SX Marketing approached Western Fair with the idea and the fair couldn't find a reason to
refuse, said Hugh Mitchell, chief operating officer at the fair.
"We did our due diligence and reference checks and they run a very professional and serious
show in Toronto," he said. "It is a mature show and frankly we do not see our place to judge
them. They have a strong following. It is a sign of the times."
The show will also be held in Toronto at the end of October and in Halifax in January.
-- -- --
IF YOU GO
What: The Everything To Do With Sex Show
Where: Western Fairgrounds, Progress Building
When: Oct. 3-5
On the Web: london.everythingtodowithsex.com (see link)
Admittance: Restricted to adults 19 years of age and older.
Norman De Bono is a Free Press business reporter.

Now- This is what was written POST show in the LFP

quote:

Sex show could trigger charges
Tue, October 7, 2008
WESTERN FAIR: City's bylaw officers will study photographs taken at the show to determine if any legislation was contravened

By RANDY RICHMOND

A trade show about sex that featured tips on stripping and classes on "pervy play time" has been captured on film by city bylaw officers, now considering laying charges.

At least one city politician is vowing a "very thorough discussion" of the weekend affairs with the Western Fair Association, which hosted the Everything You Needed to Know about Sex Show.

"I've never been part of the morality police and I don't intend to now, but if you contravene the bylaws I get concerned," Coun. Cheryl Miller, a member of the fair association board, said yesterday.

"We will have to have a very thorough discussion about it."

Bylaw enforcement officer Ken Brown said yesterday he toured the show on the weekend with a supervisor and took photographs.


"I had some concerns for some of the activities going on," Brown said. "I am going to get some film developed and speak with our legal department."

The show may have broken the adult entertainment licensing and zoning bylaws, which limit where stripping, body rubbing and other sexual entertainment activities can take place, Brown said.

Brown said he and his supervisor attended the show after getting a written complaint, filed last week before the show even began.

There was apparently enough advertising to alarm someone about the show's contents, Brown said.

The chief operations officer of the fair association, Hugh Mitchell, said he spent the weekend at the show and found only a few things amiss, which were quickly corrected.

"The subject matter is one of personal taste," Mitchell said.

"There were a few shows that we asked the operator to tone down. They were very co-operative."

Mitchell acknowledged the Western Fair, which runs every September, is well-known as a family friendly event.

But the association does not limit itself to running only family friendly events, Mitchell said.

"There are a number of events that are more specific to adults," he said, citing the fair's slots and harness racing.

Although the fair wasn't on while the sex show ran, there was a youth soccer banquet next door on Saturday.

The board will do a post-mortem on the show to see if it should run again next year, Mitchell said yesterday.

Miller said she had received several complaints about the show, but Mayor Anne Marie DeCicco-Best said her office had received no comments yesterday.

The Free Press received several letters to the editor about the event yesterday, all supporting the show.

The show's owner, Joel Levitt, could not be reached for comment yesterday.

So to each their own opinion...

Kathy